My friends and I have been having so much fun online lately, and why shouldn't we be? We all just struck gold, Facebook Gold. This piece of internet history was recently made available to members of the popular social network for only $9.99 a month. But for a limited time, Facebook is waving the $9.99 monthly fee by giving out Facebook Gold invites to lucky individuals.

Question: How do I get a Facebook Gold account?
Right now there is a limited number of Facebook Gold account invites, and I just happen to have a few. Contact me if you would like a free Facebook Gold account. Please write one to two paragraphs explaining why you deserve one. If you're lucky you might just get one. Good luck to all!

24/7 surveillance of up to 3 people on your friend list. Monthly reports by Facebook PI's detailing the subject's actions and whereabouts. Reports come in CSV or PDF format. High resolution photos are sent as JPEGs.

From the creator of Facebook, Mark Zuckerburg:

"We have received such a great response from our Facebook Gold account members that we are pleased to be rolling out Facebook Platinum next month! It's going to have all the same great features that you loved about Facebook Gold, except instead of $9.99/mo it will only be $19.99/mo."

"Please keep your fat faces glued to Facebook and don't ask questions. You all will do whatever the f*** I tell you to do, I'm Mark Zuckerburg. Facebook Platinum, get ready to be the god of your own universe!"

PLEASEEE give me a free account! I'm so worth it! I really want this & i know its sad, but i can't afford just $10 for the account! Look at my picture, I can't even afford food. I have to eat spiders. Pleaseee! & thank you!

Hello I am Harsh Jar Huab from Assam, India. I have been using Facebook since 2009. I am a poor boy, we dont have a Computer in my house, I always take money to go to the Internet Cafe. I would request you to please give me a Facebook Gold Account, I promise I will not miss use it. Thank you.

I believe I deserve, nay, require an invite to Facebook Gold because I am a tool bag. Every social media outlet needs tool bags. If you didn't have tool bags, you wouldn't have anyone to ridicule. Please do the right thing and send me an invite. The world wouldn't be the same without doing so. ~ Colin L.

Hi, I'm Dave. My life has been in ruins since my wife and kids left me last week. Also my house burned down with my dog in it too. I'm devastated. But I know that if I were to get a Facebook Gold account all that would change. Please consider my application otherwise I have nothing else to live for. ~ Dave M.